I know I could - but why don't I do it?"
How values, goals and problems interact and finally give you clarity
Why do we find it so difficult to take action?
Many people believe that they simply need more discipline or courage. But in reality, resistance is often a sign of inner conflict:
❓ "Is this really my path - or am I just doing it because I think I should?"
❓ "What am I losing by making this decision - and what am I really gaining?"
❓ "Am I even aware of my values - or am I living according to the expectations of others?"
If you know these questions, it's time to take a look at the decision triangle.
The decision triangle: value - goal - problem
The model describes how three decisive factors influence our actions:
🔸 Value (yellow, top): What is really important to you - your inner compass.
🟢 Goal (green, left): What you want to achieve.
🔴 Problem (red, right): The blockage or hurdle that is stopping you from taking action.
📝 Important insight:
If your goal is not in line with your values - or you don't clearly recognize the underlying problem - resistance arises.
My own example: My job change
When I was thinking about my career change, the decision triangle became a source of clarity for me:
My value (yellow): Freedom - I wanted more space for what really matters to me.
My goal (green): To find a job that gives me more flexibility.
My problem (red): The fear of giving up financial security and professional status.
As long as I only thought rationally ("security is important"), I felt blocked. It was only when I realized that freedom was my top priority that I was able to let go of my resistance - and make a conscious decision.
How you can use the decision triangle for yourself
1️⃣ Recognize your values: What is really important to you in life? Not what others expect - but what fulfills you.
2️⃣ Define your goal: What do you want to achieve? Is this goal in line with your values?
3️⃣ Identify your problem: What is holding you back? Is it external obstacles - or rather inner fears and beliefs?
4️⃣ Find the balance: Adjust your goal so that it really helps you progress and does not conflict with your values.
Conclusion: decisions that feel easy
When you know what is really important to you, it becomes much easier to take action. Then you don't need discipline to implement a decision - because it simply feels right.
📌 If you have the feeling that you could go, but still won't, it's worth taking a closer look at your personal decision triangle.
👉 If you would like support on this journey, I would be happy to help you gain clarity about your values - and finally take the steps that will really help you move forward.
Feel free to contact me if you would like to find out more!
💛 S incerely,
Stefanie